Tag Archives: Life

The M Word

Throughout life So far I have struggled to do things for myself. I have never been selfish, always put everyone else first.

And then along came my little Angel, my Christmas Day baby girl, her name is Danielle. My waters broke around 11:45pm on the 23rd December 2015, and I was given until 4:00pm the next day to crank labor into gear otherwise I would have to travel to birth in a different city to where I live.

I walked around, I kept hydrated, I bounced on my Swiss ball, I went up and down our stairs….but nothing! So here I was making sure I had everything I needed and headed off on what seemed to be a drive that would never end.

They checked me and my unborn baby (we weren’t going to find out the sex until delivery) and they ended up inducing me at around 8:00pm then my partner and I waited, talked, napped and waited some more.

Then at 3:20am on Christmas Day everything kicked into gear, I started having contractions but nothing really moved along fast enough. They ended up putting me on a hormone drip and later I was offered the gas.

Hours later I was absolutely buggered, I felt like I was blacking out, I couldn’t keep my eyes open, I couldn’t talk, I was exhausted. So they went ahead and gave me an epidural. I was so exhausted, I was having contractions while they were applying the epidural and I hadn’t even moved! I couldn’t!

At 4:20pm after being threatened with forceps something flicked within me and I just began to push with energy I didn’t even know I had and delivered our beautiful baby girl. A happy, healthy, 7.1 pound 55cm baby. She had decided to come right on her due date.

I stayed in hospital overnight with her by myself and still managed to somehow stay awake the whole night except around an hour and a half, I just watched her, held her, I was so proud. I was a Mother and she was my missing piece to myself, I finally had my own child.

I have loved Motherhood so far, she is growing so fast and she is so smart and so bright. Even on my worse day her smile turns my frown upside down.

I would trade in Motherhood for anything and I will always be proud of the huge amount of energy and mind power I used to get her here.

She is the love of my life! My miracle!

5 Quotes from a Billionaire

1. “Work like there is someone working 24 hours a day to take it away from you.”

2. “It’s not in the dreaming, it’s in the doing.”

3. “Doesn’t matter if the glass is half-empty or half-full. All that matters is that you are the one pouring the water.”

4. “Wherever I see people doing something the way it’s always been done, the way it’s ‘supposed’ to be done, following the same old trends, well, that’s just a big red flag to me to go look somewhere else.”

5. “Every no gets me closer to a yes.”

Mark Cuban

 

 

10 tips to success

1) Always be specific about what you want to achieve so it is easier to make it happen. Blurred ideas + Blurred vision = Blurred outcome.

2) Draw up a plan of action whether it is a brainstorming sheet, a pros and cons list, pictures or a list of your priorities; get it down!

3) Make a list of steps you will need to achieve to get there, even if the first step is dead simple, start there and write it down and follow them.

4) Act, do not be passive. Take action and follow the steps on your list. Don’t just wait for things to happen. As they probably won’t!

5) Read and listen to advice; books, articles, blogs, people’s life experience….learn by it all.

6) Alternative plans: If a certain plan doesn’t work, look for an alternative one. Don’t give up.

7) Examine your goals periodically, unfortunately some just aren’t worth trying to achieve. Some goals just lose their flare, their importance.

8) Repeat affirmations. Affirm with feelings that your goal has already been achieved. If you don’t undo your affirmations with doubts and lack of belief, they will be accepted by your subconscious mind, which will then provide you with more desire and motivation.

9) Visualize your goal – Visualization will also affect your subconscious mind, which will keep you motivated, focused on your goal, and more aware of ideas and opportunities.

10) Take action!!! Do it!! Don’t just affirm and visualize and do nothing. Take any action required to bring your goal into fruition. Follow your intuition, new ideas and opportunities that present themselves, and accept help from other people.

To delete or to not delete

Once upon a time, there was a wonderful feeling,…that was when I got a letter, whether it was in an envelope or folded in a special way that it ended up like a tiny square.

We sent photos by mail, we put photos in a photo album, where you had days you would pull them out and look through them remembering the past and enjoying what life you have had so far, whilst flicking the pages gently so no photo fell out.

You met people for drinks or lunch, you called them on the telephone to have a gossip session or even just have a text conversation. You even recieved invitations by post or hand!

Now it’s tagging, invitations via notification, photos on an insecure electronic device, basic one sentence answers, negativity on screen because you don’t have to actually confront anyone, emotions because someone removed you as a friend, computer hackers and the list goes on.

I thought to myself, hmmmm if I go ahead and take myself off this site, (Facebook) will I get any letters? Probably not. Will I go and meet friends for coffee or lunches? Maybe one day! Will I have an hour long gossip session with certain friends and family? Probably not!

But it’s a risk I’m willing to take. Why do I say risk? Well let me tell you…it’s a risk because it means I’m removing myself from the world, that is now the way communication has gone. It is sad as I miss the way things were before social media took over reality, reality is now social media.

But I still decided to remove myself from the negativity of social media. Will I ever have a pen pal again? We will see, I hope one day I get a letter that I can read and feel so happy while writing a reply, as writing is what makes my life feel most connected.

Now I can be free and connect with life.

10 Famous quotes by one individual you need in life

1. Imagination is more important than knowledge.

2. Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I’m not sure about the universe.

3. The important thing is not to stop questioning. Curiosity has its own reason for existing.
4. Science without religion is lame, religion without science is blind.
5. The significant problems we have cannot be solved at the same level of thinking with which we created them.
6. Anyone who has never made a mistake has never tried anything new.
7. Try not to become a man of success, but rather try to become a man of value.
8. Great spirits have always encountered violent opposition from mediocre minds.
9. Everything should be made as simple as possible, but not simpler.
10. The most beautiful thing we can experience is the mysterious. It is the source of all true art and science.
Albert Einstein

Feelings


The word feeling was first used to describe the physical sensation of touch through either experience or perception. But the word can also cause a lot of damage as well.The word can be used to describe experiences other than the physical sensation of touch, such as “a feeling of warmth, hurt, sadness or fright.” In psychology, the word is used for the conscious subjective experience of emotion. And emotion can be where the word feeling can be so mislead.

Perception of the physical world does not necessarily result in a universal reaction among receivers, but varies depending on one’s tendency to handle the situation, how the situation relates to the receiver’s past experiences, and any number of other factors, which is where confusion and or damage can begin.

Feelings are also known as a state of consciousness, such as that resulting from emotions, sentiments or desires.
People buy products or be with people in hopes that this certain product or person will make them feel a certain way either happy, excited or beautiful.
Past events are used in our lives to form plans and ideas in our minds and based on those past experiences we expect our lives to follow a certain script just because of a past event, but it doesn’t mean someone else understands that. They just might see you as being picky or judgemental, annoying or controlling.
When I have an in depth conversation with someone based on my feelings, even though they don’t necessarily understand where the feeling had come from in the first place, it would always be nice to be heard and respected.
Understanding of the past event leading to the feeling will be revealed. So take your time, listen, process, ask questions, then understand, don’t jump to conclusions as this can be dangerous.

The L Word

Love? Life? Lifestyle? Label? Nope it’s Lies!
Before I get into this, I am still me, I am still strong, but I am tired!

My L word…Lies.

Why do we have the ability to lie? I get the cheesy ones, you know the ‘No, you can’t have that it will hurt you.’ ‘No, I can’t come I am ill.’ ‘No, I am to tired.’

But what about the ‘he said’ ‘she said’ kind of lies, the ones that people think will make them feel better or achieve more? Do people just not care about hurting other people? Are they really that much of a coward that they have to make up a silly story to make themselves feel better? To make them feel like they have achieved something? Does it make them feel better? Or does it make them sink a little deeper but they never realise?

I wish that the people I had around me didn’t lie. I wish that people could see that life is so easy, you can live life without lies, you just don’t need to lie to the point of hurting someone or getting yourself into trouble. Why lie and then work so hard not to slip up, to have to spend so much time trying to hide the lie with another lie so it doesn’t unravel…Gosh it’s draining just thinking about it!

I have heard enough lies this year alone from many different people, I have removed enough negative people from my life this year, but they will still keep coming(the lies), I have done nothing to these people, I have no energy for these people. 

I have a loving partner and a beautiful baby girl. My back should hurt from the tiredness from my little family of three, my head should hurt from the tiredness of my day to day schedule, but it doesn’t. My back and my head hurt because of the lies, because of the hurt they have caused. 

I am done…I am tired…I need to be left alone…I crave to be freed from all the negativity…but I just can’t seem to hide for long enough. 

Acceptance

In the past one of the most important things to me was acceptance, I wanted people to accept me for me, but who doesn’t?

I have doubted myself so much during life to the point where I know I’m my own worst enemy.

I applied for a job recently, and it is one that I doubt I will get, I’m still waiting to hear back and I am not even nervous.

During the interview I wasn’t nervous I just wanted to do it for myself to stop the what ifs occurring later.

I realised though afterwards that it didn’t even matter if I am not accepted for it because I am accepted in so many other ways.

Becoming a Mother for me has changed my life, and for the best I must add, for some reason, the only person I now hope to have acceptance from, now and forever is my Daughter Danielle.

I hope I will always be good enough for her. I know deep down I need to accept myself. Easier said than done though right?

I shall wait and see what my future has to offer, patience is key.

Pages

With these pages I share my life, my darkest secrets I bring to life, but not just said, hidden in text, can you find them and make them fit?

Into my life my past and future, reality, dreams, fun and laughter.

Keep on reading these pages for more, find my secrets, they can’t be ignored.

Did you find one? Not in here, keep on reading, read to breathe, breathe to read.

Written by me 🙂